To welcome the New Year: four craptacular train wrecks

Okay, maybe a little harsh but tomorrow is Thursday, the first day of 2009 and my fancy isn’t even the least bit tickled with the four major releases opening tomorrow. They are; Bolt, Marley & Me, The Tale of Despraux and Yes Man. On second thoughts I might see Yes Man just because of the delightful Zoey Deschanel and Murray from Flight of the Concords. But I’d have to be bloody despraux to see a film about a mouse that goes to rescue a princess from rats. In my eyes no animated film on mice and rats can beat Ratouille. Ever. Bolt on the other hand looks like it’s overcrowded with painfully likable characters which are clichés stolen from every other animated movie ever made. And finally, Owen Wilson and Jennifer Aniston have a puppy that repairs their fractured relationship in Marley & Me. Vomit anyone? If the trailer is anything to go by then the best acting in that god-awful film is done by the dog who even has better hair than Wilson. I think I’ll read a book this week and instead count the days until the advance screenings of Milk.