Religion 101

Me: I just thought it was kind of ironic they asked me to write for a Catholic newsletter when I’m technically an atheist.

Granddad: Don’t say that wee friend.

Me: It’s true. All religions are branches of the same tree anyway. Same dude, different name.

Granddad: *silence*

Me: All religion has ever done is cause war, poverty and grief.

Granddad: *long pause* You’re not supposed to know that . . . .