A big budget piece of ship

The latest instalment in the six billion dollar Pirates Of The Caribbean franchise makes you want to walk the plank. Four years after the last swashbuckling adventure, Johnny Depp and Geoffrey Rush arrrr back in Pirates Of The Caribbean: On Stranger Tides. We first catch up with Depp's iconic character Captain Jack Sparrow in London, where the crown try to employ him to go on a voyage to find The Fountain Of Youth before their Spanish rivals do. After a daring escape, Sparrow runs into his father (Keith Richards) and a former flame Angelica (Penelope Cruz) at a nearby pirate bar before waking up onboard Queen Anne's Revenge, the ship captained by “the pirate all pirates fear'' - Blackbeard (Ian McShane).

Turns out Angelica is Blackbeard's daughter and the duo need Sparrow to navigate their way to the Fountain Of Youth so the notorious pirate can cheat a death prophecy. As well as racing against the Spanish, Captain Barbossa (Rush) is hot on their sail and looking to reunite with Sparrow so they can get revenge on the murderous Blackbeard who also has zombie minions. And his beard lights up when he smokes. And there's man-eating mermaids. Savvy?

Yep, the On Stranger Tides plot makes about as much sense as Cruz's role in the film, which is to say, none. Although there have been holes in the other films in Disney's flagship franchise, Depp's Oscar-nominated performance and the turns from a supporting cast including Rush, Kiera Knightley and Orlando Bloom has been enough to keep the films afloat. This time around that's not the case. Knightley and Bloom clearly recognise a sinking ship when they see one and have jumped over board, with acclaimed actors Cruz and McShane added to the cast in their wake.They add little life to the film, flopping around aimlessly, and even Depp looks as if he doesn't want to be there. For the first time in the series, which relies heavily on the shoulders of Depp's performance as Sparrow, the actor doesn't seem to be enjoying himself. It's only in the final 10 minutes the cheeky charm, flamboyance and liveliness that we associate with Sparrow seems to return. By then it's too late and Rush has been left to do all the work. But it's nice to see they took the minimalist approach to costume design with Sparrow. Not.

Everything about Pirates Of The Caribbean: On Stranger Tides is over the top; from the endless locations to the very premise itself. With the director of the past three films opting out, Rob Marshall (Chicago, Nine) has stepped in and become the studio's lapdog, replacing sense and creativity with the Michael Bay's take on filmmaking; stunts + fire + nearly topless women = success. With a big budget and big running time, Pirates is small on any lasting enjoyment and will leave your mind plank.

P.S. Keep an eye out for Australian supermodel Gemma Ward in a cameo as an ethereal yet evil mermaid.

Pirates Of The Caribbean: On Stranger Tides opens Thursday, May 19.

Read more...

Living the McDream

"It's a little cheesy, but that's fine.'' Australian actor Callan McAuliffe is talking from his Los Angeles home about his new film I Am Number Four, the Michael Bay produced blockbuster about an alien in highschool. McAuliffe's character Sam befriends said alien, play by Alex Pettyfer, and the pair team up to fight an evil horde of creatures invading the town. It's a fantastic role for the 16-year-old Sydney lad, who has spent the last year and a half trying to break into the Hollywood market after bit parts in Packed To The Rafters and Blue Water High.

His big break came during a 2009 holiday to LA when he landed the lead role in Flipped, written, directed and produced by industry heavyweight Rob Reiner (The Princess Bride, A Few Good Men, When Harry Met Sally, This Is Spinal Tap). After being called back to audition five times, McAuliffe said he ``didn't think they would want an Australian because of all the travel involved.'' He was wrong.

Not only did he get the part, but the role brought him to the attention of the I Am Number Four casting directors. With just one audition McAuliffe got the part and joined the cast with Pettyfer, Glee star Dianna Agron, Timothy Olyphant and fellow Aussie Teresa Palmer as alien number six.
``It was a fantastic experience,'' he said.
``I came from Flipped straight to I Am Number Four which was an extreme contrast.
``It was a multi-national cast with Alex being British and Dianna and Tim American.
``But having another Australian on set in Teresa was great because at least there was one person to laugh at my jokes.
"Americans, they just don't get our sense of humour, you know?
``She was hilarious and although we would muck around, as soon as D.J. (director D.J. Caruso) yelled `action' we would snap back into our characters.''
McAuliffe said fans of producer Michael Bay will be expecting ``explosions'' and they won't be disappointed, with plenty of stunts and special-effects. And although his character didn't get to do ``any dangerous stuff''', McAuliffe said he did get to shoot a gun.
``It was a real shot gun in special casing to make it look alien,'' he said.
``I did get to do all of my own stunts, which weren't too impressive because my character doesn't get into much action.
``But I was definitely looking forward to shooting that gun the whole time.
``It was an alien gun too.''

Palmer, on the other hand, was not only an alien in the film but got to perform some of the most dangerous stunts herself. The Aussie rising star said she relished the opportunity and played ``an alien who kicks major bad-alien butt'.
``We're getting pursued by the bad aliens, but my character is sick of running away so she turns around and the hunters become the hunted,'' she said.
``I got to do my own stunts and I had someone film this one amazing stunt I did.
``I was attached to a harness which was attached to a 60 foot crane and when they said `action' I had to run and the harness, that was attached to just my leg, would pull me back and I would go flying 60 feet up in the air.
``I had to act like this huge alien, a Piken, was pulling me up and I would be kicking and screaming and trying to stab it with this dagger.''

I Am Number Four is out tomorrow.

Read more...

Got your number

It’s a shame I Am Number Four has been promoted as a supernatural romance reminiscent of Twilight, but with Aryan poster children Alex Pettyfer and Dianna Agron (above) as the teenage lovers. Really, it’s more of an action blockbuster in a similar vein to the hits of Michael Bay, who serves as producer.

It follows John Smith (Pettyfer) who tries to pass himself off as an ordinary teenager but in reality, is actually one of only nine aliens who escaped the planet Lorien when the evil Mogadorians invaded and went Hitler on their race. John and his guardian Henri (Timothy Olyphant) have spent their lives on the run, trying to elude the Mogadorians who have tracked the refugees to Earth and are killing them off in sequence. The latest town they roll into is Paradise, Ohio.

Henri begs John to keep a low profile as it's vital they don’t repeat a recent incident where his leg inconveniently lit up like a light night at a beach party. John says “I know how to blend in” and demonstrates his master-of-disguise prowess by chucking on a hoddie and enrolling in the local high school. There he meets Sarah (Agron), a cheerleader turned photographer, and sparks fly. Literally, as John’s powers are developing rapidly and between his hands turning into spotlights in class and making street lamps explode, he’s having a hard time staying under the radar. Which is why the high school’s resident nerd and UFO theorist Sam (Callan McAuliffe) catches on to John’s secret and after a big reveal, the pair become allies. Just in time too, as a horde of Mogadorians arrive in town in pursuit of John.Directed by D.J. Caruso (Disturbia, Eagle Eye, Taking Lives), I Am Number Four is what it is; an alien action blockbuster with romance at its core. Kind of like E.T, minus the bicycles.

The film is based on a popular science fiction novel published in 2010, with DreamWorks Pictures buying the film rights a year earlier based on the manuscript. Buffy scribe and producer Marti Noxon has adapted for the big screen, along with Smallville helmers Alfred Gough and Miles Millar, and the trio do a fine job off crafting a steady building film for their target audience. They know their strong points and whenever the story gets a tad too romantic or slow, they counteract it quickly with action and special effects. Considering this is a Michael Bay produced film, you know the effects are going to be top notch. Thankfully the nonsensical elements of Bayhem productions are mostly absent, with the exception of the entire cast being good-looking and Caucasian. A brunette or multi-racial cast member in I Am Number Four is harder to find than Charlie Sheen’s sobriety.

Plus, as filmmakers Bay and Caruso are about as subtle as unobtainium. For instance, Aussie rising star Teresa Palmer gives a scene-stealing turn as fellow alien number six who, instead of sitting around and waiting to be killed, is actually a kick-ass warrior. She comes in at a crucial moment to help John and his buddies escape the Mogadorians and gets the best line in the film; “Red Bull is for pussies.” But to really drive the point home, she dresses in leather, wears studded gloves and drives a red motorbike. Okay, we get it, she’s sexy and badass. Ease up on the overt symbolism.Performance wise Pettyfer continues his role as the latest action boy template; he slots nicely into any big budget flick but never leaves an impression. Agron is memorable, but her monotone voice is more irritable than it usually is on Glee. There are some genuinely awesome sci-fi moments, mainly thanks to the original looking Mogadorians and their horrific pet creatures. With tattooed scalps, gills where cheeks should be, fangs and a looming 7ft-plus physique, they’re creepy enough as it is. Yet their manner and interaction add an extra `eek’ factor. Their hunter creatures too are fantastically freaky and obviously the result of a dozen dinosaurs and a Predator thrown into the blender. It also packs a clever original score from Trevor Rabin, which helps build tension, and is complemented by a too-cool-for-school soundtrack from the likes of Beck, The Black Keys, Kings Of Leon, Adele and The Temper Trap.

I Am Number Four sets up a sequel perfectly and, depending on box-office results, you can count on there being at least another two films (the author has six novels planned). It’s essentially an inter-species love story, complete with action, suspense and, unlike the Twilight Saga, it actually delivers on its promise of M-rated gore. Sure, this isn’t a film that’s going to change the world. But it’s a sufficiently entertaining meal for the multiplexes. I Am Number Four opens in cinemas on Thursday, February 24.

Read more...

Palmer lights up Hollywood

They say when one door closes, another one opens and that was certainly the case when George Miller's Justice League movie was cancelled just a few weeks into rehearsals. Adelaide actress Teresa Palmer (above) was to play super villain Talia al Ghul in the superhero mash-up alongside Batman, Wonder Woman and Superman. Although she was `devastated', the weeks in rehearsal gave her the opportunity to bond with American actor Jay Baruchel, who is best known for roles in Knocked Up and Tropic Thunder.
``It was fortunate for me because I got to know Jay. . .and when we did a chemistry test for The Sorcerer's Apprentice we had already worked together and I got the part,'' says the 24-year-old.
``It's very surreal actually; I never expected to be in a Jerry Bruckheimer film starring across from Nicolas Cage.''

The film sees physics nerd Dave (Jay Baruchel) recruited as the new apprentice to master sorcerer Balthazar Blake (Cage) in a battle to save New York City from the evil Maxim Horvath (Alfred Molina). Palmer plays Dave's love interest, Becky, and says the shoot was a unique opportunity to get to know some Hollywood heavyweights, especially Cage.
``Nic is very intriguing person, he has so many layers to his personality - he's funny, delightful, interesting, quirky and so off the beaten track,'' she says.
``And he's just a funny character because he's really intense and quite humourous, and can be quite serious.''

It is the third big Hollywood role for Palmer, after The Grudge 2 and Bedtime Stories, as well as parts in Australian films such as 2: 37 and December Boys alongside Daniel Radcliffe. She says her growing popularity overseas is largely thanks to the work of other Australian actors.
``Americans have really embraced the Australians,'' she says.
``It might have something to do with the wonderful actors before us like Cate Blanchett, Russell Crowe, and Naomi Watts, who helped paved the way because they were so focussed and wonderful in their work.
``It opened the doors for us.''

Doors are continuing to open for Palmer, who just finished shooting romantic comedy Kids In America (alongside boyfriend Topher Grace) and the Michael Bay and Steven Spielberg produced blockbuster I Am Four. Set on Earth, the alien action film is new territory for Palmer, who says she got to do her own stunts and `play an alien who kicks major bad-alien butt'.
``We're getting pursued by the bad aliens, but my character is sick of running away so she turns around and the hunters become the hunted.
``I got to do my own stunts and I had someone film this one amazing stunt I did.
``I was attached to a harness which was attached to a 60 foot crane and when they said action I had to run and the harness, that was attached to just my leg, would pull me back and I would go flying 60 feet up in the air.
``I had to act like this huge alien, a Piken, was pulling me up and I would be kicking and screaming and trying to stab it with this dagger.''
Palmer is set to make a return to Australian film when she stars alongside Joel Edgerton in Nothing To Say, which begins filming later this year. In the meantime, she is travelling to Africa with charity organisation The Happy Africa Foundation to film a documentary on their work at an orphanage.The documentary will be Palmer's directorial debut, but that doesn't mean she's giving up acting anytime soon.
``Directing, well I'm so interested in filmmaking and philanthropic and this is a nice way to merge it all together,'' she says.
``I'm going to dip my toes in the water with it and hopefully I will be good at it, but I always want to keep acting.
``I'm so ecliptic in every aspect of myself, in my clothes, my taste of music and my taste of film, that I'm all over the shop.
``I love comedy, action, romance, drama, I don't have one specific genre and by being willing to try anything it keeps you mentally stimulated.
``Hopefully I will be able to keep doing that with my career.''

Speaking of career, Hollywood is the graveyard for many a promising young star, with fame and fortune corrupting the likes of Lindsay Lohan, Kirsten Dunst and Winona Ryder, to name a few. But Palmer, who has been based in Los Angeles for several years now, is keeping her feet firmly on the ground.
“Hollywood can be a very addictive drug and it can be a very dangerous world,” she says.
“There are ways to avoid it and sympathise with actors who have peaked early then spiralled out of control.
“It’s an easy thing to happen if don’t have good judgement and aren’t protected by your managers and agents.
“For me it’s surreal to meet these actors and filmmakers that you’ve looked up to for so long.
“I recognise how lucky and blessed I am and I would never take it for granted.
“It keeps me grounded, especially in Hollywood when there is so much temptation.”

It would be easy to let all the recent success go to her head, but Palmer says her friends help her keep a grasp on reality.
“I don’t let work define who I am,” she says.
“I have work and then I have my life.
“I find it relatively easy because I only work for six months of the year then you have rest of time off hanging with friends.
“When I’m working I stay in touch with them through Skype.
“As soon as they call action I’m creating a character, but when they call cut, I go home and I step back into myself.
“A lot of actors do method acting and that doesn’t really work for me.
“I just try to switch off at the door and when I come home for the day I be myself and enjoy life.”

The Sorcerer's Apprentice is out on Thursday. You can watch my video review of the film HERE. Note how I have fulfilled my journalistic ambitions by slipping in the phrase `bat-shit crazy’. Hooray!

Read more...

The scales of Justice League

It would have been the Aussie movie that brought together Batman, Superman and Wonder Woman on the big screen. But Justice League's supervillain was the Global Financial Crisis which wiped the project out just weeks before shooting was about to get underway. Australian actress Teresa Palmer has spoken out about the film, in which she was to star as one of the villains.

Currently back in the country to promote her new film Sorcerer's Apprentice, with Nicolas Cage and Jay Baruchel, Palmer said the cast were devastated about the failed project.
``I know Megan Gale had even got to try on her Wonder Woman costume and it was the same with the Batman and Superman costumes,'' she said.
``I played a villain so I didn't get to start trying on my costume, but we were all in Sydney rehearsing for a few weeks.
``It was fortunate for me because I got to know Jay (Baruchel) who was also playing a villain and when we did a chemistry test for the Sorcerer's Apprentice we had already worked together and I got the part.''

Australian filmmaker George Miller, best known for the Mad Max franchise, was directing the project which is based on DC Comics series of the same name. It sees prominent superheroes within the DC universe unite to fight crime.The film would have included characters such as Batman, Superman, Wonder Woman, The Flash and Green Lantern. Palmer said she was to play supervillain Talia al Ghul and that like the storyline in the comics, there was a love interest between her and Batman.
``There were a few romantic sparks (in the script),'' she said.
``It would have been great because Batman was played by the strikingly handsome Armie Hammer.
``It was very disappointing and I would still love to be involved in it if something ever did happen again.''The Justice League cast included a batch of relative unknowns in the roles, including supermodel Megan Gale as Wonder Woman, rapper Common as Green Lantern, OC alumni Adam Brody as The Flash, D.J Cotrona as Superman, Santiago Cabrera as Aquaman, Hugh Keays-Byrne as Martian Manhunter, Palmer (above) as Ghul and Baruchel as unknown villain.

Now that Marvel Studios have got Buffy creator Joss Whedon working on an Avengers movie, rumours have been circulating that Justice League might go back into production. Palmer said if Miller and the same studio were involved, she would not hesitate to rejoin the project.
``It was an amazing role,'' she said.
``I got to know George quite well and we did some intense workshops and got to spend a lot of time together.
``It was amazing to spend time with him because he's such a veteran and a prestigious filmmamker and an icon in Australia.
``It was flattering to be working with him so closely.''

Palmer said they discussed working together on his fourth Mad Max film Fury Road but `unfortunately' she was not able to do it due to scheduling conflicts. Mad Max: Fury Road too has hit financial difficulties and although filming was supposed to begin in Australia this year, it has been pushed back to February, 2011. In the mean time, stay poised for full interview with Palmer coming in the next few days and her tell-all about Steven Spielberg and Michael Bay produced alien-actioner I Am Number Four.

Read more...

C'mon baby make it hurt so good

Why is it when director Michael Bay makes movies about masculinity (Bad Boys, The Rock, Transformers etc) he ends up degrading women and assaulting the senses? Whereas when Kathryn Bigelow broaches the subject, despite not having a penis, she is able to bring a sense of understanding and finesse.

In her latest film Bigelow paints a portrait of the military's most unrecognized heroes; the technicians of the bomb squad. The Hurt Locker chronicles the lives of three members of the Army's elite Explosive Ordnance Disposal (EOD) squad as they battle insurgents and each other to seek out and disarm a wave of roadside bombs on the streets of Baghdad.

The character set-up is basic; Staff Sergeant William James (Jeremy Renner) is the new cocky-but-brilliant bomb disarmer who disrupts the comfortable group dynamic with his rogue methods. Yet it is the extraordinary circumstances these men find themselves in and Bigelow's masterful direction that propel the story forward.

Bigelow doesn't seem too far removed from her Point Break days in the bromance between the soldiers and masculine-fuelled rivalry, yet the overindulgent cheesiness that plagued her previous films is replaced with raw emotion. Marco Beltrami and Buck Sanders help build the suspense with a modest score that surges forward at the crucial moments, before slipping into the background when needed.
Elevated by an Oscar-nominated performance from Renner (above), keep an eye out for fleeting cameos from the likes of Guy Pearce and Ralph Fiennes. Not to mention the superb work of location scouts and set decorators to recreate war-torn Iraq in Amman, Jordan.

Another strong point is the story, written by freelance journalist and Playboy contributor Mark Boal. Based on his accounts as a journalist embedded with an American bomb squad in the Iraq war, Bigelow was already familiar with his work and adapted one of his previous articles into television series The Inside. The pair kept in touch about his experiences and he eventually moulded them into a fictional retelling of real events. Wanting to show the soldiers experiences beyond “what you see on CNN” Boal certainly achieves that, with the script equaling his brilliant work on 2007's The Valley Of Elah.

It is easy to pigeon-hole The Hurt Locker as a war drama, which it is, but it is also a bad-ass action film that transcends the superficiality of the genre by exploring the reactions of soldiers to extremely violent and traumatic situations. For every superbly choreographed action-sequence, there is a slow-motion shot of a bomb disintegrating the surrounding landscape in a beautiful, almost dreamlike way. Mixed in with the struggles of the central characters are close-up's of the war-ravaged faces of Iraqi civilians or a feral cat hopping through the rubbish on the streets.

Bigelow delivers her message in small, meaningful packages throughout the film building to a finished product that serves as one of the best dramatizations of the Iraq war.

The Hurt Locker is leading the 2010 Oscar race with Avatar, both with nine nominations.

It is released in metropolitan cinemas this Thursday, February 18 and regional cinemas next Thursday, February 25.

Read more...

Revenge of the ballin'

I should start this with a disclaimer: I’m not particularly fond of director Michael Bay. Unlike majority of his audience I’ve never found his drawn-out, explosion-ridden films enjoyable and most of his lead characters feel like an affront to the human race. When I knew I would have to sit through his latest project, Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen I had to make a conscious effort to keep an open mind. Yes, people thought I was slightly crazy as I sat down in the cinema muttering to myself “just keep an open mind”. But this process was going well until the opening credits started and the first of many unnecessary explosions began.

Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen is the sequel to 2007s uber successful Transformers and takes up where the first one left off. After saving the world, befriending an alien race and getting the girl of his dreams Sam Witwicky (LeBeouf) is off to college and determined to be a `normal guy’. Needless to say the universe has other plans for him. The evil Decepticon robots return to Earth to destroy Sam after he learns the origins of the Transformers. Luckily for Sam he happens to be BFF’s with the good robots, the Autobots led by Optimus Prime, who have formed an alliance with America’s military forces.

However, you don’t need to know any of this because like all Bay films the plot is about as necessary as a Paris Hilton album. The remainder of the movie follows Sam and friends across what the military commander describes as “some random Egyptian desert” in a bid to find the key to destroying the universe before the Decepticons get it. Given the average person goes down at least three IQ points after watching Bay movies, Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen still asks viewers to throw a lot more than caution and logic to the wind. For example, for supposedly superior beings it’s laughable the ancient Transformers went for the ol’ hide-the-key-to-destroying-the-universe-behind-a-painting trick. Alas, Bay expects you to go along with this and many other plot shortcomings.

Fans of the first Transformers movie are likely to be disappointed with this effort. Sure, the effects which bring the robots to life are still amazing but what’s really missing is the human element. What made Transformers enjoyable was the talent and quirks of actors like LeBeouf and John Turturro. In the sequel, the actors have little room to move and it feels as if Bay has begrudgingly thrown in the human characters as a segue way between action sequences.

Composer Steve Jablonsky once again delivers a truly suspenseful score for the movie and there are moments when it’s best to close your eyes and just enjoy the brilliance of his work. He has composed on several of Bay’s previous films and here he manages to create the perfect musical balance between adventure and danger. His new music fits ideally into the background of the film and once again Jablonsky proves himself to be one of the most creative and original composers around. Bay, on the other hand, tends to follow formula and regurgitate ideas that work.

Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen seeps with unoriginal ideas `borrowed’ from a range of earlier and better films. James Cameron must be asking for royalties for a scene practically ripped straight from Aliens where the key baddie, the Fallen, resides in an outer space lair complete with baby Decepticons dangling in embryonic sacks around him. It bares such an uncanny resemblance to the Queen alien, I was sure Sigourney Weaver was going to burst in at any moment and snarl "get away from her you bitch". This is not to mention several effects shots almost identical to those in X-Men 2 and the Mufasa-esque voice of Optimus Prime.

Even the most loyal Bay fans must have been questioning the sanity of their beloved director after a scene in, wait for it, robot heaven. Yes, he really has outdone himself this time and the Bayhem has been raised to an all time high. It’s as if he has made a conscious effort to provide Matt Stone and Trey Parker with as much source material for a Team America sequel as possible.

Did I mention the movie duration? I wouldn’t have been surprised if I was married with children by the time this fiasco finally wrapped up. To pass the three and a bit hours I counted the number of people who walked out of the opening night screening. There were four.

It’s no wonder, as this has to be by far the most ludicrous of all Bay films (which is saying a lot considering this is the guy who made Pearl Harbour and Armageddon). There is no semblance of plot throughout the entire movie. Instead of a beginning, middle and end, Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen is comprised of three main ingredients; explosions, slow motion shots of military equipment and Transformers doing what they do best – transforming.

The lead characters, many of them continuing over from the first film, adhere to all the clichés. The military unit in particular nearly implodes from cliché overload. You have the token Caucasian soldier with his roguish good looks, the token black soldier who belts out phrases like “whoop ass” as often as he loads his gun and there’s the token British soldier whose sole purpose in the film is to predict impending doom.

Yet it’s Bay’s female characters who leave the nasty aftertaste. At the fore you have Megan Fox playing the token hot chick who, on top of pouting and disrobing on queue, also wisely purrs the line “all girls like dangerous guys”. Once you throw in a college full of women who dress and act like they’re in a non-stop Nelly video and Sam’s idiot of a mother, you get the feeling this is a director who has contempt for the opposite sex. In fact, there isn’t one female character in the film who isn’t in some way offensive. It seems Bay is betting on his audience wanting their women to be like his movies; dumb and eye catching, with nothing under the exterior.

Consensus? Long enough to make Titanic feel like a short-film, Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen delivers on the explosions and robots but lacks suspense and originality.

Read more...

Transformers: More than meets the red, glowing eye

It’s no secret I disliked the Transformers movie and spent the entire film laughing my head off at the shameless product placement, shotty acting, over the top script, self indulgent special affects and utter Bayhem that was Michael Bay’s hugely successful creation. Yes, it cut me deep within my soul to know this trashtastic film made so much money and even spawned a generation of f-wits getting the Transformers logo tattooed on them. Seriously, the number of people I’ve seen with a Transformers tattoo freaks me out to no end. Being the box office smash that it was, several sequels are inevitable with the first, Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen, being released in Australia on June 25 this year. As much as I'd promised myself not to write any news on the Transformers sequel I have a friend who is hopelessly in love with the movies and all Bayhem related projects. So this post and image is for you and only you. Please note, I’m getting no enjoyment out of this. Empire Magazine online posted the first image from the up and coming Transformers sequel on their site yesterday.

The image has got quite a lot of hits which leaves me asking the question, why? The poster depicts the main baddy of the film (The Fallen) but all you can really tell about the Wall E related robot is he has two, red glowing eyes. Whoopdy freakin doo. I’m pretty sure I can create a better marketing poster in paint. And just to further push myself in to the good books online blogging site comingsoon.net has a rough image of Sideswipe, one of the new robots to be featured in Tranformers: Revenge of the Fallen. Click here to check it out.

Read more...

And a smack is what you shall get!

It has recently come to my attention that my blogging is as consistent as the plot of a Michael Bay film. If only my posts could be as frequent as Takashi Miike releases.
- - - PUN - - - OVER - - -LOAD - - - MUST SELF DESTRUCT - - IN 4 – 3 – 2 –
- ar fuck it.

Read more...